Wednesday, December 29, 2004

THE JUNIOR MISS PAGENT

Okay so, I was asked to judge the Junior Miss Pagent. This was my first time getting envolved with a beauty pagent. Oops, I mean "Scholarship Program" (which it is now called - and they looked for every opportunity to correct me...."Scholarship Program"- yeah, right!)

ANYWAY, So I am judging this pagent and first was the interview portion. We were asked to only judge the contestants by.... how they presented themselves, projected their voices, and responded to our (judges) questions....NOT on how factual the responses were.

Okay so, I think they thought I would be a biased judge because there was one black girl in the pagent and believe me ya'll,....inside, i was like "go black girl!" but more so than the black girl, I was really routing for the 2 girls that were on the fluffy side. It's crazy, in black culture, you could be a size 14 and if it's all in the right place,...people would swear you were fine. The other judges were treating the "fluffy" girls (really like size 10 and the other maybe 12) like it was blasphemy for them to have even considered entering the pagent (which totally ticked this "full-figured and fab"diva off).

There were 13 contestants. I knew these girls were like 15-17 and they wouldn't be rocket scientists but dayum!!! Alot of them were so dumb and hadn't a clue of worldly issues. At least in the 80's, everyone was about ending aparthied, freeing Nelson Mandela, famine relief, etc. These girls were worse than Alicia Silverstone in "Clueless!" (at least she was knowledgable about fashion).

EXAMPLES:

*On the bio sheet, one contestant said that her favorite sport was football. She was asked, "What's your favorite NFL team?" She replied by boasting proudly, "The GEORGIA BULLDOGS!"

*Another contestant (the black girl), listed Senator Hillary Clinton as someone that was most interesting to her. (I was impressed and a little proud inside that she thought of DIVA Clinton) I asked her simply, "Why?" She said,"because Hillary Clinton was the FIRST female senator!"

*Next contestant (skinny white girl), tries to play on my blackness and lists Dr. Martin Luther
King Jr. as her most interesting person. I asked, "Why?" She said, "He's done alot for Blacks."
I said,"Like What?" There was an awkward silence and then she says, "UUhh! I'm not real,
real-ly sure."

Good thing the answers didn't have to be FACT.

Some of the judges were BRUTAL! This guy (judge) says,... "I'm blind....describe the color YELLOW to me." The poor girl looked like a dear in headlights.

ALL OF THE CONTESTANTS (except the black girl and the "big" girls), it seemed, were asked the party they would have voted for if they could vote. They said,...Republican Party (which is where i began deducting points). Then of course, there were the ones that tried to play on religion..."The Lord Jesus (thick southern accent) is my savior. I volunteer at the church because I luuve tha Lord!" (like with all the crap going on in the world, God would say,..."Focus on the pagent")

Alot of them had no career goals or college choices even though they were competing in the pagent (The "SCHOLARSHIP PROGRAM").

And MOST of them, sad to say,...only aspired to be wives and mothers. Is it just me or is it sad that this was their only goal in life?

The talent portion was great. I was proud these Bush supporters did so well considering the fact that funding for enrichment programs and the arts are drastically cut. However, there were 2 contestants that decided to do interpretive dance. OKAY, NEVER EVER DO INTERPRETIVE DANCE IF YOU EVER WANT TO WIN ANYTHING,....EVER! (which had alot to do with the black girl losing)


I learned alot in the 7hour process to pick a winner. ( i was so ready to go)

The girl that won was average and a little short but she blew it out of the box. She was sharp, confident, talented, and very well prepared. The fluffy girl came in second. She kicked butt during her interview, the aerobic portion (she could kick it with the skinnies without breaking a sweat......thank me for bringing that fact to the attention of the evil fat prejudice judges) and she performed a hella monologue/skit. She worked it.

All in all, it was an experience. The girls that tried to pass on looks ALONE got squashed. There had to be substance. My job was done.

9 comments:

Sunnchine said...

That sounds like quite the interesting pageant, lol! At least they had you there to judge in a level-headed manner. I think I would have been pissed at a judge if he would have asked me to describe the color yellow to him. I might have had to ask him back something just as stupid!

Casey said...

I was bored just reading that, I couldn't imagine judging the darn thing..

**Christen** said...

lol at this post... I did one pageant and I felt like a rocket scientist compared to the other girls lol... I was so bored with it and I was the only black girl and was militant and sang the black national anthem... so you know who didn't win haha

Apocalypse said...

"fluffy"....too cute :)

Zantiferous3 said...

First of all I would have definitely been pissed that the other judges felt the need to correct you when you said "beauty pagaent," but felt like the fluffy chicks shouldn't have entered.

Girl you know as soon as they would have made mention of the weight or whatever I would have been like, "Right, right, since this is definitely NOT a beauty pagaent." LOL Girl please that would have pissed me off.

Stoney said...

Sounds like an experience, LOL. At least the person who should have won did. Fluffy, that's a good one. When I read it I started thinking about cake. Go figure. I don't like the fact that most organizations who host pagents don't call them that anymore. Its misleading, deceptive, and totally political.

Jdid said...

Martin Luther King did alot for blacks, what exactly we're realy not sure lol

Amber_sun said...

stumbled on your blog...(seems we both are listed for liking the movie Love Jones)... Anyway, love your writing-- amusing, touching and sardonic all at the same time! (Okay do I sound like one of those movie blurbs or what?)

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