Today has been a crazy day thus far. I recorded my jazz show and was invited to lunch by my friend, Tara. She knows that when she mentions "The Lobster," ....it's on! So, I snuck away from work to meet her for lunch. We order our food. Since I'm dieting and trying to take on a healthier perception of what I deem, 'delicious,' I ordered the broiled flounder and steamed veggies (I love seafood). So we're just chit-chatting, catching up and all, when my food comes. Halfway into lunch, I noticed a small hair. It was short, black and curly, and ya'll know what I was thinking, right? PUBES!!!! I tried not to, as they say "be ghetto" and go off. I was civilized, sophisticated and proper. I asked the waitress to take it away. She asked, "Why?" I showed her the "PUBE." She said, "Uh, that's not a hair. That's a fish vein." I looked at it again, this chick actually had me second guessing myself and I started to think that maybe, just maybe, (like the ghetto boys) my mind was playing tricks on me. My friend Tara said,"Let me see!" So, after her analysis of my plate, she confirmed that," YES, THIS IS A PUBE!" The manager comes, apologizes and takes the plate away promising a fresh new dish. So, Tara eats and I wait. As I watched her eat, I started to freak out inside. I always order this dish and I love tatar sauce. Usually, I ask for extra tartar sauce and I spread it on till it looks as if I am having fish with my tartar sauce instead of the other way around. Anywaz,...I was thinking,"what if i had gotten it like i always did? i never would have even seen the PUBE. EEEKK! I WOULD HAVE EATEN A PUBE! .......then of course I lost my appetite, which was the exact time the waitress sat my hot and freshly cooked PUBE replacement meal in front of me. Me? GRREEAATT!! Just FREAKING GREAT!
betcha think that was it, hunh? NOPE!
The waitress comes to the table to give me a bill. I look at the bill and again, I had to muffle the inner ghetto-princess. I said,"Excuse me. This bill is wrong." The waitress said,"Oh, no it isn't. We took of your diet coke because of the "HAIR" mishap." Now, I'm pissed. So I said, first off....I am not one of those people that will come in a restaurant, complain and show their ass to get free food. I HAD A LEGITIMATE COMPLAINT. Secondly, A free diet coke for the exchange of an entree with a PUBE? (in sheer amazement) COME ON NOW! Any other place would have at AT LEAST given you a freakin' desert or a coupon for free food the next visit. Lastly, YOU OVERCHARGED ME FOR THE PUBED ENTREE!!! (they charged me for the dinner portion when i had the lunch portion, a $4.oo difference)
So, now I am hungry and pissed. Ain't that a bitch!